she thinks that happiness is a mat that sits on her doorway...

She says it's cold outside and she hands me my raincoat
She's always worried about things like that
She says it's all gonna end and it might as well be my fault
And she only sleeps when it's raining
And she screams and her voice is straining

(chorus)
She says baby
It's 3 am I must be lonely
When she says baby
Well I can't help but be scared of it all sometimes
And the rain's gonna wash away what I believe

She's got a little bit of something, God it's better than nothing
And in her color portrait world she believes that she's got it all
She swears the moon don't hang quite as high as it used to
And she only sleeps when it's raining
And she screams and her voice is straining

(chorus)

She believes that life is made up of all that you're used to
And the clock on the wall has been stuck at three for days, and days
She thinks that happiness is a mat that sits on her doorway
But outside it's stopped raining

I was chillin' at a friend's house a while back and we were listening to random songs when this happened to pop up on the playlist on his computer. Wow, I'd forgotten what a great song this is, and being that it was popular back when I was in middle school, I hadn't really had a chance to think about what the song was really saying. All too often, we concern ourselves with making sure we memorize all the lyrics without objectively thinking about the underlying meaning behind the words that we so hollowly bellow out when we are riding in our cars or entertaining ourselves in the shower. I've been pondering this song for a couple weeks now, and I think I've about gotten it annotated. But in all seriousness, correct me if you think I'm wrong.....I wanna know what you really think. Here goes:

First of all, if you do decide to download this song, I'd recommend the acoustic version because I think that the mood of this version complements the meaning. I mean, the original version is definitely rockin' but I think it takes away from the meaning. Ok, so the song is about a couple in an unhappy situation due to a compatibility flaw that could easily be remedied by a simple change in ways, but unfortunately, the refusal to 1) acknowledge the problem, 2) fix the problem, and 3) walk away from the problem leaves the situation at a stalemate. This is illustrated by the fact "she only sleeps when it's raining" where the rain is symbolic of the presence of the problem, and her escape is to sleep it off, almost like a bad hangover or something. Furthermore, the "rain washing away what [she] believe[s] in" suggests that she is afraid of the inevitable change that would be necessary to improve the situation. Change is a very scary thing, I agree, but sometimes people forget to be practical when it comes to recognizing how essential change is for the improvement of the quality of life. In this situation, change entails either a change in thinking, a change in ways, or a change in status of the situation. Failure to be open minded towards change and fear of being left alone forces the relationship to keep progressing to an even further level of dysfunction. This, of course, is exacerabated by the understanding that the guy has for this girl. He recognizes the problem, feels that the change isn't within his realm of control, but stays with this girl out of pity. He sees her naivety and recognizes her oblivion and, thusly, stays wrapped around her finger in fear of hurting her. He says, "she believes that life is made up of all that you're used to" and succombs to her desires to stay together. He justifies this by saying "she's got a little bit of something, God it's better than nothing" which is a rather conspicuous example of denial, and in spite of the fact that "the moon doesn't hang quite as high as it used to," he continues to yield to her "happiness." He's neither strong enough to walk away or capable of initiating the necessary change to improve the relationship. Thus, they continue to suffer through the perils of storms that plague them with hopes that it'll all just blow over so that they can achieve some sort of level of contentment. Possibly the best lyric in this song (if not ever) is "she thinks that happiness is a mat that sits on her doorway".....wow. It's a way of saying that people think that happiness is something that is deserved, not something that you work on for yourself. Waiting on the rain to stop so that you can be happy again doesn't constitute genuine happiness but instead says that you wait and let circumstance dictate your level of happiness when, in actuality, we are in control of the decisions that we could be making in order to achieve optimal happiness. For this couple, the most appropriate decision would be to walk away, but they just can't because the fear of being alone or unhappy is too empowering. Instead, they will continue to dwell in this level of contentment and hope that there won't be too many storms to throw off their equilibrium. Let's hope for their sake that they never realize what they are missing out on because the realization that they are merely sticking with what's comfortable instead of trying to find something better and opening themselves up to opportunity would be very disheartening, especially when they realize how much time they've wasted. This lesson, as simple as it seems, is one that should be learned by all. All too often, we try so desperately to work out situations that simply are not meant to be worked out. I agree, relationships take a lot of patience, a lot of understanding, and a helluva lot of work, but there are just some situations that are meant to be broken. That's such a hard concept to grasp. I know in the past I've had such a hard time walking away from situations without justifying to myself that we should invest a little more time in the situation in an attempt to work things out. At face value, it makes sense because you've worked so hard already to form a bond and get to know somebody. You fall into a routine and reach a level of comfort that is special because you let somebody see you at your absolute worst but they still love you. But sometimes, it turns into beating your head against the wall as you face the same problem, time and time again, and somehow, you have to muster up enough strength to just walk away. Period. You can't let opportunity pass you by because you never know what you could be missing out on. Unfortunately, this strength is hindered by how much you come to understand even the bad things in a person. You know them inside and out, and the level of comfort that you obtain allows you to accept the most negative aspects of their character. I will never understand why people are this way, but I guess I will have to accept it because that's just the way it is. And while it sucks to be an outsider and see it all, there's no way I can provide the insight that will initiate this change. As a result, the strength will stay within me, leaving me with no other decision but to walk away. And man, you better believe that sucks.

Ok, why I just completed a Mrs. Lee annotation of that song is beyond me, but it just seemed appropriate, and I have to say that I'm rather excited that I've finally figure out that song. Your thoughts are more than welcome. I'm really interested to hear what you guys have to say. Anywho, thanks for reading. Until next time...........

"When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am."