Sex in the Classic City

So, I read this article in the "Sex in the Classic City" section of last Friday's Red and Black, and, sadly, I think that the author, whom I've always found to be a bit chauvinistic, is absolutely right. I guess I can't blame him for the general tendencies of the male population in Athens, but I'm still rather disgusted by the truths revealed in this article. Basically, the article considers discrepancies across genders of expectations for potential significant others during the infancy of a relationship. You'll have to read the article for yourself because I'm too lazy to plot out all the points for ya, but sadly, I've realized that by trying to maintain high standards and retain reasonable expectations, I've fallen in the trap that ultimately leads to an even harder fall for girls when things don't work out. Damn.

The article notes that, "a girl wears a crush like a ring and therefore believes that a guy with a genuine crush should devote his undivided attention to her alone." Well, isn't it true that a guy really isn't that into you if he can't be exclusive? The societal norms in Athens (or any college town for that matter) suggest that if a guy hangs out with a girl too often, he might smother her, seem too needy or desperate, or it might ruin his chances with other prospects. But because of a guy's biological need for female interaction, he must spend limited time with multiple girls until something flourishes into a full-blown, exclusive relationship. Basically, it just means that all guys around here are just a bunch of players, and I really would love to know how many real relationships ever come about using this dating method because if the method has been proven to be faulty, perhaps I can stop being so damn hard on myself!

Is it so wrong for a girl to expect your undivided attention, especially if she's willing to give you hers? Aren't relationships about reciprocity? I'm the first to admit that when interested in a guy who shows any interest in me, I immediately start looking towards the immediate and long-term future to prepare to spend time with him and to make sure that our circumstances will provide ample nourishment towards our potential relationship. The slightest things run through my head like, "I need to sweep my bathroom floor, wash my sheets, shave my legs, and have gum in my purse at all times," and then further down the line, you have to consider bigger things like, "well, Statesboro is only an hour and a half from where I'm going to be in Augusta which isn't too bad," or "well, he's going to be in the Bahamas all summer working on sailboats which basically means I won't get to see or talk to him very much, if at all." Of course, I usually don't let these things dictate my decision to pursue the relationship (I'm an idiot like that) but it's at least nice to be prepared I guess. Women are planners - would you expect anything less? Apparently, this ultimately expedites the inevitable let-down because no matter how much chemistry you have with a guy, knowing that he isn't giving you his undivided attention ruins any plans that we might have made. Therefore we are left to try again........and again........and again.

There are guys in this town who aren't governed by these callow rules (I know this first hand...my roommates date these guys...gag.) I sure as hell haven't found a guy that hasn't been willing to play games, so fortunately for me, I'm getting out of here in hopes of having better luck in the future. Let's just hope that these rules don't continue to haunt me, because I suck at the game and I'm tired of playing!

Until next time.....love you guys!

“You can lead a boy to college, but you cannot make him think.”
~Elbert Hubbard