"Life at best is bittersweet..."
So, it's official: I've signed my lease and will be moving to Augusta on May 6th. As excited as I should be about this, I find myself dreading the date of departure to the point where this bittersweet change in my life is tasting more and more bitter. I know that it's human nature to resist change, but how do you go from a great college town like Athens to a city like Augusta where your sole purpose will be to go to school and study (because that's all I'm going to have time to do thanks to the high expectations presented by the MCG DPT department)? It's kind of funny because while it's been in my plan to go to PT school since the day I changed my major from computer science to exercise and sports science, actually going seems kind of crazy. I mean, who is insane enough to give me a doctorate so that society has to address me as Dr. Gray?? I know I can get through the program (school has always been my thing and as much as it sucks, I'm the master of figuring this shit out) but sometimes, it just seems almost dumb that I'm choosing an environment where my social stimulation will be restricted by time I don't have and that being able to go downtown and unwind will not be an option. I mean, y'all know me...do I seriously seem like someone with enough discipline to be a doctor? Who knows, but this is the path I've chosen, and I'm finally taking the next step. Is it a dream come true? Not so much. I never doubted I would get where I am right now, I'm just not so sure that I'll be able to find someone that's going to be able to keep up with me. But then again, maybe I won't be the black sheep (let's pray that they admitted someone just as nuts as I am!) Either way, I'm thankful to have Jonathan and Paige to appreciate me on my bad days. It's just going to take some time and a lot of funny looks before the rest of these people accept the fact that I'm a little crazy......
Needless to say, I've found myself wondering why I opted to go with the 3 and a half year program as opposed to the 5-6 year program that most UGA students choose. Athens is a unique college town in that everything was built around UGA simply to cater to college students. Why didn't I milk it for all it's worth? I definitely got a lot out of the past 4 years that I've been an Athenian, but letting go is going to be one of the hardest things ever. Hell, we have alumni that come back and still pretend to be college students. Maybe some people never let go. And maybe we don't have to. After all, this experience has really played a huge roll in who I've become. Athens was my "Red Dirt Road" (where I drank my first beer...where I found Jesus...etc.) Depending on who you talk to, some people go to college get their MRS degree/find their wife, some people come seeking to find their true selves, and some come to learn every detail of every subject that their professors waste time lecturing on and spend countless number of hours in the library absorbing as much useless information as they can. Then there's the rest of us who come just to get through it and just so happen to find ourselves on the way while learning some useful things that we'll take with us in the next chapter. My mold is more solid thanks to Athens, and, while I'm not done growing by any means, I honestly think my roots are a little deeper here than they are in Perry. Perry came with too many cushions to fall on. For example, I got in trouble with some of my friends senior year and was taken to court, almost arrested, and ended up having to hire a lawyer to negotiate a deal to keep me out of trouble. Mom was there to pick up the tab (around $1500) and fight my battles for me. In Athens, however, I had a run-in with the ACC Police on my 20th birthday, and $400 later, my record was still clean thanks to my ability to responsibly handle the trouble I got myself into. The point is, there were a lot of things I had to figure out for myself. I dealt with loneliness, grief, financial instability, weight issues, stress from school, car problems, plumbing/electricity problems, depression, hangovers, illnesses, and I did it all on my own with friends/family to fall back on during occasional hardships that I needed help with. I've grown more in the past 4 years than I have in my 22 years on this earth which explains why leaving the place that I've seemingly conquered is complemented by a deep heartache. I've accomplished a lot, and now I have to start over. And I know I can do it, I just not so sure I'm ready to. But, I guess I have no choice, now do I?
I'm entering Augusta with more strength than I've had my whole life and with Athens in my heart. That makes it easier to "move on", but that doesn't mean I'll be dry-eyed when I exit the Athens City Limits on Highway 78 towards the uncertainty Augusta holds. Luckily for me, I have 2 more weeks to live in denial, and you better believe that I'm going to be living it up! In the meantime, I'll be praying for a little cushioning to get me through this inevitable change.
Until next time....I love y'all!
“Moving on is a simple thing; what it leaves behind is hard.”
Needless to say, I've found myself wondering why I opted to go with the 3 and a half year program as opposed to the 5-6 year program that most UGA students choose. Athens is a unique college town in that everything was built around UGA simply to cater to college students. Why didn't I milk it for all it's worth? I definitely got a lot out of the past 4 years that I've been an Athenian, but letting go is going to be one of the hardest things ever. Hell, we have alumni that come back and still pretend to be college students. Maybe some people never let go. And maybe we don't have to. After all, this experience has really played a huge roll in who I've become. Athens was my "Red Dirt Road" (where I drank my first beer...where I found Jesus...etc.) Depending on who you talk to, some people go to college get their MRS degree/find their wife, some people come seeking to find their true selves, and some come to learn every detail of every subject that their professors waste time lecturing on and spend countless number of hours in the library absorbing as much useless information as they can. Then there's the rest of us who come just to get through it and just so happen to find ourselves on the way while learning some useful things that we'll take with us in the next chapter. My mold is more solid thanks to Athens, and, while I'm not done growing by any means, I honestly think my roots are a little deeper here than they are in Perry. Perry came with too many cushions to fall on. For example, I got in trouble with some of my friends senior year and was taken to court, almost arrested, and ended up having to hire a lawyer to negotiate a deal to keep me out of trouble. Mom was there to pick up the tab (around $1500) and fight my battles for me. In Athens, however, I had a run-in with the ACC Police on my 20th birthday, and $400 later, my record was still clean thanks to my ability to responsibly handle the trouble I got myself into. The point is, there were a lot of things I had to figure out for myself. I dealt with loneliness, grief, financial instability, weight issues, stress from school, car problems, plumbing/electricity problems, depression, hangovers, illnesses, and I did it all on my own with friends/family to fall back on during occasional hardships that I needed help with. I've grown more in the past 4 years than I have in my 22 years on this earth which explains why leaving the place that I've seemingly conquered is complemented by a deep heartache. I've accomplished a lot, and now I have to start over. And I know I can do it, I just not so sure I'm ready to. But, I guess I have no choice, now do I?
I'm entering Augusta with more strength than I've had my whole life and with Athens in my heart. That makes it easier to "move on", but that doesn't mean I'll be dry-eyed when I exit the Athens City Limits on Highway 78 towards the uncertainty Augusta holds. Luckily for me, I have 2 more weeks to live in denial, and you better believe that I'm going to be living it up! In the meantime, I'll be praying for a little cushioning to get me through this inevitable change.
Until next time....I love y'all!
“Moving on is a simple thing; what it leaves behind is hard.”
posted by Stacy @ 12:16 AM
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