My Give A Damn's Busted
Ok, so Kit started yet another trend, and I have to say, I've read his entries and have vicariously come to feel the stress relief of his ranting and raving. So why not create yet another distraction in my life by starting my own? I don't even know if anyone cares enough to read this, nor do I care. If nothing else, it'll give you profile stalkers more material to sift through. I guess I should steal Kit's disclaimer as well and let it be known that for me, the blog is nonetheless an outlet for my thoughts, feelings, hopes, fears, dreams...etc. We all have to vent about the good and bad, so let's just face it, I might say some things you don't agree with, but my thoughts are simply my own and as far as I'm concerned, your ideas are welcome but your opinions are not. I don't mean to offend anyone, and if I do, then talk to me about it and I'll buy you ice cream later, k?
Alright, so I'll admit it, I signed up for Live Journal which would have been fun had I really had anything to vent about at the time, but I never found time to get it started (the story of my life). But "the blog" is so fun! Being the huge dork I am (as well as the hugest procrastinator....yes, I'll do anything to avoid studying physics), I looked up "blog" on dictionary.com (told you I was a dork) and found out that "blog" is a shortened form of "web log" which in the end is the most boring definition ever, but it's still fun to say things like, "leave me alone, I'm bloggin'" or "your blog is bullshit" or........yeah I could go on forever. It's just a fun word (yeah, I'm easily amused.....doesn't take much, huh?) so I'm excited about what my new "bloggin'" experience holds for me.
Ok, so I'm a huge dork for putting those thoughts out for public viewing, but I guess I'm too delirious and overwhelmed to care. Maybe it'll give us something to talk about next time we talk..................so what's new with me? Not a damn thing really. Same shit, different day. You know how it goes. I could honestly go on for a good while about everything that's fucked up in my life at present, but I'm in the best mood that I've been in all day, so I'm choosing not to ruin that. But seriously, this bloggin' thing is going to definitely come in handy as I've just cut off communication from the one person who actually liked to hear me vent. It's rather complicated, and while I haven't really gotten the truth in it's entirety regarding the situation, I really have lost a good friend. Maybe it was just one sided, but all I can say is that he was probably the one person I told EVERYTHING to, yet maybe I failed to let him know that. I guess it wasn't enough, but this leads me to an even deeper thought: why does change have to happen? I suppose we would all get bored if there wasn’t some drama in our lives, but why the overload? I mean, seriously, are we so bored that we have to go through this emotional roller coaster time and time again in order to maintain the “excitement” in our lives? I just don't understand how feelings can change so suddenly with a magnitude that completely jumbles up a person's life with such permanence that leaves them alone, confused, hurt, and empty? It's a downward spiral.......emotions getting tossed up and passed along, and all at once! It's insane! I guess the saying, "when it rains, it pours" holds multiple truths........it's a phenomenon that will probably never hold a valid explanation, but hey, do I really have anything better to do than ponder the pettiness of life? Probably so, but at this point, I'm over school and anything related to it, so my thoughts are all that remain. What can I say? My give a damn's busted...........
Ok, so, after thinking about it, this blog thing might exacerbate the drama already present in my life, but I feel better now that I've put some random thoughts out there, so there ya have it. Take it or leave it. I should probably go and study physics now, but instead, I'm going to curl up with my book and pretend that I'm still on spring break....
stay tuned..... love you guys!
Don't worry you will find the answer if you let it go
Give yourself some time to falter
But don't forgo know that you're loved no matter what
And everything will come around in time
--Sarah McLachlan
Alright, so I'll admit it, I signed up for Live Journal which would have been fun had I really had anything to vent about at the time, but I never found time to get it started (the story of my life). But "the blog" is so fun! Being the huge dork I am (as well as the hugest procrastinator....yes, I'll do anything to avoid studying physics), I looked up "blog" on dictionary.com (told you I was a dork) and found out that "blog" is a shortened form of "web log" which in the end is the most boring definition ever, but it's still fun to say things like, "leave me alone, I'm bloggin'" or "your blog is bullshit" or........yeah I could go on forever. It's just a fun word (yeah, I'm easily amused.....doesn't take much, huh?) so I'm excited about what my new "bloggin'" experience holds for me.
Ok, so I'm a huge dork for putting those thoughts out for public viewing, but I guess I'm too delirious and overwhelmed to care. Maybe it'll give us something to talk about next time we talk..................so what's new with me? Not a damn thing really. Same shit, different day. You know how it goes. I could honestly go on for a good while about everything that's fucked up in my life at present, but I'm in the best mood that I've been in all day, so I'm choosing not to ruin that. But seriously, this bloggin' thing is going to definitely come in handy as I've just cut off communication from the one person who actually liked to hear me vent. It's rather complicated, and while I haven't really gotten the truth in it's entirety regarding the situation, I really have lost a good friend. Maybe it was just one sided, but all I can say is that he was probably the one person I told EVERYTHING to, yet maybe I failed to let him know that. I guess it wasn't enough, but this leads me to an even deeper thought: why does change have to happen? I suppose we would all get bored if there wasn’t some drama in our lives, but why the overload? I mean, seriously, are we so bored that we have to go through this emotional roller coaster time and time again in order to maintain the “excitement” in our lives? I just don't understand how feelings can change so suddenly with a magnitude that completely jumbles up a person's life with such permanence that leaves them alone, confused, hurt, and empty? It's a downward spiral.......emotions getting tossed up and passed along, and all at once! It's insane! I guess the saying, "when it rains, it pours" holds multiple truths........it's a phenomenon that will probably never hold a valid explanation, but hey, do I really have anything better to do than ponder the pettiness of life? Probably so, but at this point, I'm over school and anything related to it, so my thoughts are all that remain. What can I say? My give a damn's busted...........
Ok, so, after thinking about it, this blog thing might exacerbate the drama already present in my life, but I feel better now that I've put some random thoughts out there, so there ya have it. Take it or leave it. I should probably go and study physics now, but instead, I'm going to curl up with my book and pretend that I'm still on spring break....
stay tuned..... love you guys!
Don't worry you will find the answer if you let it go
Give yourself some time to falter
But don't forgo know that you're loved no matter what
And everything will come around in time
--Sarah McLachlan
posted by Stacy @ 11:39 PM
2 Comments:
At 10:39 PM ,
Ludakit said...
Nice. I feel so happy knowing I set a new trend. However, I can't say I started this. Stole it from a friend of mine. But hell, for the purposes of this discussion, I started the whole damn experience.
I invented the blog. Kinda like Gore invented the internet.
At 4:09 AM ,
default said...
What's up Stacy? Haven't chatted in a while. I noticed the link to your "blog" in your AIM profile and decided I was bored enough to indulge myself in someone else's personal life. I even created my own account just so I could leave a comment, so feel special :)
As far as your busted 'Give a Damn', I find that simply not giving a damn can totally change one's life. Look at me, for example. I can't say my life is horrible, and I can't say it's absolutely fan-friggin-spec-tubular, but I really don't give a shit either way. And if it takes multiple addictions to heroin, crack, pot, nicotine, alcohol, porn and puppies to finally "not give a shit", then by all means, indulge.
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